|I Wish I Were Gus|
|Ray in "I Wish I Were Gus"|
|Air Date||September 27, 1996|
|Writer(s)||Kathy Ann Stumpe|
|Preceded by||I Love You|
|Followed by||Standard Deviation|
I Wish I Were Gus is the 3rd episode of Season 1, and is episode 3 of the full 210 episodes for the entire series. In this episode, Ray has two problems to deal with. He has to give Gus' eulogy, and at the same time deal with the fight between his mother and his aunt Alda.
- Episode Title: I Wish I Were Gus
- Episode Number: Season 1, Episode 3 (#3 of 210)
- Air Date: September 27, 1996
- Episode description (from DVD): "Ray's Uncle Gus dies, and his Will states that Ray, who fears speaking in public, is to read his eulogy. Meanwhile, Marie is upset because her estranged sister, Alda, is coming to the funeral."
- Ray Romano as Ray
- Patricia Heaton as Debra
- Brad Garrett as Robert
- Doris Roberts as Marie
- Peter Boyle as Frank
- Madylin Sweeten as Ally
- Sawyer Sweeten as Geoffrey
- Sullivan Sweeten as Michael
- Jean Stapleton as Alda
- Hugh Holub as Funeral Director
- Joey Dente as Audience Member
- Marlena as Member of Family
- Carmen Filpi as Ancient Guy
- Preceded by: "I Love You"
- Followed by: "Standard Deviation"
The episode begins with Frank telling Ray that his great uncle Gus died, and he wanted Ray to give his eulogy. Ray, who doesn't like speaking in front of people, is afraid to do it. Then Marie comes in and says she's not going to the funeral because her sister Alda is going to be there.
It's then explained that Marie had put Alda at a table all the way across the room at Ray and Debra's wedding, so Alda has been mad about that ever since, which caused the friction between Marie and Alda.
Later, Marie ends up going to the funeral and she butts heads with her sister. They argue and make a big scene before Ray gives the eulogy. Even during the eulogy, which Ray is struggling with delivering, Marie and Alda are constantly bickering.
After the eulogy, Ray takes Marie and Alda outside and sits them down. He talks to them and they eventually make up with each other. But then Debra steps in and asks why Alda ruined her wedding all those years ago. That then sparks the conflict between Marie and Alda yet again.
There's a gag in this episode that has no relevance to the main story of the episode. Ally takes a black marker and draws an Adolf Hitler type of mustache on one of the twins. Of course, the marker doesn't wash off. So when the Barone family gets to the funeral, they walk past some old World War II veterans, one of which freaks out at the sight of the Hitler look-a-like.
- FRANK: Can Hitler have a juice box?
- RAY: You two are sisters. Family should talk.
- MARIE: Like you and Robert?
- RAY: We talk. A lot of that just goes unspoken.
- RAY: (in regards to Uncle Gus) I always felt like I was his grandson.
- FRANK: He wants you to deliver his eulogy.
- RAY: What?! I hardly knew the guy!
- FRANK: It was his dying wish.
- ROBERT: Even dead people love Raymond.