|Look, Don't Touch|
|Air Date||October 11, 1996|
|Preceded by||Standard Deviation|
|Followed by||Frank, the Writer|
Look, Don't Touch is the fifth episode of Season 1, and is episode 5 of the full 210 episodes for the entire series. In this episode, Ray goes to Nemo's with Bernie, and is served by an attractive waitress, Angelina. Debra finds out, and Ray gets flustered about it. They later go to Nemo's with the kids, and Angelina serves them.
- Episode Title: Look, Don't Touch
- Episode Number: Season 1, Episode 5 (#5 of 210)
- Air Date: October 11, 1996
- Episode description (from DVD): "Debra gets upset with Ray after he sticks his foot in his mouth regarding a sexy new waitress at Nemos."
- Ray Romano as Ray Barone
- Patricia Heaton as Debra Barone
- Brad Garrett as Robert Barone
- Doris Roberts as Marie Barone
- Peter Boyle as Frank Barone
- Madylin Sweeten as Ally Barone
- Sawyer Sweeten as Geoffrey Barone
- Sullivan Sweeten as Michael Barone
- Tom McGowan as Bernie
- Tina Arning as Angelina
- Joseph V. Perry as Nemo
- Susan Varon as Suzy
- Preceded by: "Standard Deviation"
- Followed by: "Frank, the Writer"
- Ray: "... We're gonna have the usual."
- Angelina: "I just started on Saturday, nobody has a usual yet."
- Ray: "It's uh four slices, everything on it."
- Angelina: "That should be an occasional."
- Bernie: "Oh, my god. If I wasn't married, you know what I'd do?"
- Ray: "Wear the same underwear every day?"
- Ray: "Angelina? Don't know anyone by that name."
- Debra (on the phone): "Does he know what this is regarding? ..."
- Debra: "She's got your wallet."
- Ray: "What. What do. My wallet?
- Debra: "Yeah, it's at Nemo's."
- Ray: "I didn't go to Nemo's."
- Debra: "Well your wallet made it there somehow. Do you have your wallet? Ray, she said she just waited on you."
- Ray: "Oh Nemo's. Nemo's, yeah. Might have been a waitress over there. Even though we usually go to the counter. But today Nemo forced us into this table, where the waitresses go. So we had to have a waitress. Not have a waitress. We uh we had waitress service."
- Debra: "So how pretty is she?"
- Ray: "I didn't say she was pretty."
- Debra: "You didn't have to. You're being so defensive about it. My gosh, you'd think there was something going on."
- Ray (laughing): "No, no, no, no. no, no, no."
- Debra: "You're a freak."
- Ray: "What? What did I do?"
- Debra: "Come on, can't you be honest? I mean, look Ray, if you saw someone pretty today, you could tell me."
- Ray: "I saw nothing."
- Debra: "Ohoh, wow, she must be beautiful."
- Ray: "Look, she's Nemo's niece. How beautiful can she be? You've seen Nemo. All right, some men might find her attractive. Nothing like you, though."
- Ray: "Which means that you are the more attractive one. I... I have the right to an attorney."
- Angelina (to Debra): "Hi. I think we spoke on the phone earlier, I'm Angelina."
- Debra: "Oh, hi."
- Ray: "I'm sorry, that was rude of me. This is Debra, the little lady. I don't mean little in a size way, or little that she doesn't matter. She's my big lady. She's my great big lady."
- Debra: "It's nice to meet you."
- Angelina (after handing Ray the tray of food and drinks): "Oh, I forgot. You like Parmesan."
- Ray: "No! No, Parmesan. No Parmesan." (Spills the tray of food and drinks on Debra)
(Long moment of silence)
- Ray (to Debra): "Unless you want Parmesan?"