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Here is a list of memorable quotes from characters other than the main five.

Season 1Edit

Bernie: "I gotta take this test! I just hope I'm stupid enough."
Ray: "Don't worry."
Bernie and Ray talking about Robert's IQ test [src]
Lois: "We're going to Vietnam."
Frank: "Vietnam?! What, do you owe Charlie some payback?"
Lois and Frank [src]
Warren: "How's police work treating you?"
Robert: "Well, ya know, one day you're rescuing a puppy and the next day you're fishing a skull out of a toilet."
Warren and Robert [src]
Mel: "Fred and Bishop are parking the car."
Debra: "Fred and Bishop?"
Mel: "They're friends of mine. We're not gay."
Mel and Debra [src]
Priest: "Your parents are Frank and Marie Barone?"
Ray: "Yes!"
Priest: "You're absolved."
Priest and Ray [src]
Dr. Nora: "So Ray, what's it like having three children under the age of 5?"
Ray: "Well, I like to tell people it's kinda like a frat house. Yeah. Nobody sleeps, everything's broken and there's a lot of throwing up."
Dr. Nora and Ray [src]

Season 2Edit

"So, Kevin does the play-by-play for the Mets, and I'm just his humpback stat guy."
Andy [src]
Ray: "Look, you have to do what mommy says."
Ally: "Why?"
Ray: "'Cause I do."
Ray and Ally [src]
Ally: "Can we name them?"
Frank: "Yeah. Let's call these two Lee and Stan, and that big one with its mouth open we'll call Marie."
Ally and Frank naming the fish in the tank [src]
Scott Preman: "Didn't you have bio class with her junior year?"
Ray: "Yeah. We had dissection. I pinned her frog open."
Scott Preman and Ray talking about Jessica Bell [src]
Gianni: "Mrs. Barone, I don't know what's in this dip, but if you weren't married..."
Frank: "Take her. I'll throw in the dip."
Gianni and Frank [src]
Debra: "Marie, I'm sure Ray's friends aren't interested in Tupperware."
Andy: "Actually, I could use some new ice trays. My cubes smell."
Debra and Andy [src]
"I'm the wrong guy to talk to about women. Even my fantasies just want to be friends."
Andy [src]
"And just because I was never married doesn't mean I'm gay."
Uncle Mel [src]
"Holy crap."
Zia Sarina [src]
Anna: "Well, my grandfather used to talk about this sardine packer, and when he came to America, he just called himself Barone. Stole our name."
Ray: "Sounds like us."
Anna and Ray talking about the Barone family history [src]
Ray: "Health Department."
Nemo: "That ain't funny, Raymond!"
Ray and Nemo [src]
Andy: "First, you gotta take last month's ending balance, then you add the interest accrued on the account. Then you add all the checks that we know have cleared, and then you subtract that number from... Ray, what did I just say to you?"
Ray: "Accrued."
Andy and Ray trying to figure out the Barones' finances [src]
"No getaway car. Got no friends?"
Judy insulting a criminal [src]
Ray: "All I need is another quarter-inch."
Gianni: "Who doesn't?"
Ray and Gianni, with Ray referring to his height [src]
Warren: "Hello there, son-in-law."
Ray: "Hello there...you."
Warren and Ray [src]
Ray: "Hey, Uncle Mel. How are you?"
Uncle Mel: "I'm good. You look like a bus toilet."
Ray and Uncle Mel [src]

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