Here is a list of memorable quotes from Season 2.
Ray's on TVEdit
- Marie: "Ray, we told you you were a good writer so that you would think you were a good writer. See, then somebody gave you a job. That's what parents do, they all lie to their kids for their own good."
- Ray: "But other parents aren't lying, Ma. They believe in their children."
- Marie: "No they don't."
Father Knows LeastEdit
- Marie: "You know, without discipline, Mozart would have been one of those bang-ganging rapsters."
- Ray: "Snoop Motzy Mozart."
- Ray: "After golfing, uh, we were in the locker room and I got this weird feeling."
- Debra: "Oh. Ray, you are not gay."
- Ray: "No, I know. You told me that, but this was something else."
Working Late AgainEdit
- Robert: "Ya know, I could've been a pretty good hockey player. You know, big, had the toughness, good hand-eye coordination."
- Ray: "Yeah but, eventually, you would've had to let go of the side."
- Robert: "I'll call you if there are any fights."
- Ray: "I may be calling you."
The Children's BookEdit
- "I hate this freakin' bunny!"
- Ally: "Can we name them?"
- Frank: "Yeah. Let's call these two Lee and Stan, and that big one with its mouth open we'll call Marie."
- Debra: "The good news is you don't have to worry about this for a year."
- Ray: "No, no. You know nothing about worry. It's not that I don't have to worry for a year. It's that I have a year to worry."
- Scott Preman: "Didn't you have bio class with her junior year?"
- Ray: "Yeah. We had dissection. I pinned her frog open."
- "No, I've never ruptured my booty. One time I did sprain my groove thang."
- Gianni: "Mrs. Barone, I don't know what's in this dip, but if you weren't married..."
- Frank: "Take her. I'll throw in the dip."
- Debra: "Marie, I'm sure Ray's friends aren't interested in Tupperware."
- Andy: "Actually, I could use some new ice trays. My cubes smell."
All I Want for ChristmasEdit
- Frank: "My feet are killing me. I think these boots are a size too small. Tell me, what's it say on the bottom of my right boot?"
- Ray: "Left."
- Anna: "Well, my grandfather used to talk about this sardine packer, and when he came to America, he just called himself Barone. Stole our name."
- Ray: "Sounds like us."
- "You're so busy defending your saint of a mother, that you make me out to be some kind of ungrateful nutcase!"
- Andy: "First, you gotta take last month's ending balance, then you add the interest accrued on the account. Then you add all the checks that we know have cleared, and then you subtract that number from... Ray, what did I just say to you?"
- Ray: "Accrued."
The Family BedEdit
- Robert: "You gave me liquor?"
- Marie: "Not liquor, dear. Liqueur."
- Debra: "That smell. You burned the popcorn again, didn't you?"
- Ray: "Well, that's an easy one. Now try and guess what I spilled."
- Debra: "So it was just the once and then you got married?"
- Frank: "It was just the once and then we HAD to get married."
- Robert: "Don't you have an outstanding moving violation, Dad?"
- Frank: "I wouldn't say outstanding. It was pretty good, though."
- Ray: "It was nothing. I ran over one of those orange cones, that's all."
- Frank: "Tell her why."
- Ray: "I don't remember, Dad."
- Frank: "I remember. I was there. It had something to do with a halter top."
- Debra: "So you just ride around looking for naked."
- Ray: "Well if it won't come to me..."
- "The binder's not just a guide, Debra. The binder is...binding."
Six Feet UnderEdit
- Ray: "All I need is another quarter-inch."
- Gianni: "Who doesn't?"
The Garage SaleEdit
- Marie: "I used to put Robbie in a little pink dress and dance him around the room."
- Debra: "You got any pictures of that?"